� 2003-05 Design and Content by Disco
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@ 5:33 pm on 08.23.03
I just got off the phone with Andy and we talked at length about the crazy customer he had today. Said customer has always seemed like a normal guy in the past, but today he whipped out the crazy like a bouquet of flowers on an anniversary and gave Andy some Jehovah�s Witness pamphlets. Andy, having been bored at work with nothing to do, went ahead and read it. Of course, his excuse isn�t just the boredom, it�s that he wants to be able to say to Captain Crazy in two weeks when he comas back to repay his payday loan, �Uh, sorry. Read it. Crazy talk. Not happening.�He read me excerpts about goats and sheep and how God will choose 144,000 people to help him rule in Heaven once all the unclean (the goats) have been wiped from the earth and the pure (the sheep) live in paradise. 144,000 exactly? What an arbitrary figure. Do they have scholars sitting there whittling numbers and trying to figure out how many people God can fit in the expanse of Heaven without worrying about overcrowding and urban sprawl? I just don�t get it. That, and them referring to me as a goat. Sorry, I like my premarital sex, lust for people of the same sex, and cursing. Last time I checked, I wasn�t nibbling on tin cans and rubbing my horns on tree trunks. I am no goat, you bastards!
An excerpt from the tail end of our conversation:
A: �Wanna come over later and I can give you the Good News?� (Good News presumably being the title of one of the propaganda deals)
Me: �Is the good news chlamydia? Cuz, if it�s chlamydia, I don�t want it.�
This is by no means an unusual occurrence in conversations between members of our circle. One of us, Muppet, is even prone to pointing at one of us and shouting, �Unclean!� One of us inevitably responds with laughter while still another says something to the effect of �yeah, like getting silly drunk every night and being potbellied and covered in what looks like orange shag carpeting is the height of cleanliness.�
